Tuesday, Sept. 14, 2004
Woo hoo! So, the sellers accepted our offer and we are all set for our closing date on 9/30!!!! I can't believe it!!! Honestly, I always dreamed of having my own home and coming from very humble beginnings.....I never thought it would really happen. Thanks to my wonderful husband - it is!So, have I talked about my freakin' weightloss lately? O.k., more accurately - my LACK of weightloss? I am afraid to step on the scale. I don't think I've lost anything in over 3 months. Sad, sad, sad. ESPECIALLY because JD and I were talking about letting nature take its course and seeing if we get p.g. with another in the future. But, I just REFUSE to get p.g. at this weight. I am SOOO sick of being fat. I can't even stand to look at myself in the mirror and nevermind having my picture taken. Which REALLY makes me sad because I want to have memories of DJ and I and geez, it shouldn't be about me. Ya know?
Ugh, some people have it so easy. My girlfriend in AL has her 3rd girl (who's about 1 month behind DJ) and when I was down visiting her - she'd eat way more than me and can you guess? Yup, she is way thinner than I and looks as though she's back to pre-pg. weight. O.k. so she didn't gain almost 70 lbs. I KNOW those darn powdered doughnuts were evil but they kept calling to me!!!!
Alright, so EVERYDAY is a new day. Today I did well but need to get my arse out and exercise. It's SOOO key but also keeping my fingers out of the bad things. And not just that, keeping my hands out of them so often! JD asked for a tube of cookie dough the other night and going to the store hungry didn't help. So I bought those for him and a whole tub of cookies. I've eaten.....oh, I don't even know how many but more than I should. I had a lot left and I finally threw them in the garbage today - after looking at my fat arse in the mirror...oh yeah, and after eating one. Ugh! I'm so weak when it comes to eating yummy things!
So, enough is enough. Today I feel that I've finally hit the point in which I say enough is enough. You know, I have griped about my weight but never really got to the point where I felt it deep in my bones that I REALLY wanted to lose this weight.
So, today is a new day and the beginning of the end of having my shorts ride up between my legs when I walk.....and that I have fat that shows up under my shirt from my bra.....and looking at my fat face in the mirror.
I'm going to do it!!!!